My Fantasy Lineup
While bored I decided to make my own fantasy roster. I determined the amounts of wrestlers,titles, etc. by a rough (but fair) estimate of a real WWF/WWE roster. So here it is:

Fantasy lineup- Anyone from any time

50 Wrestlers-10 women(for wrestling , but they can also manage)

4 Announcers-Mainly announcing , but you can use them as you wish(wrestling/managing)

6 Managers/Valets-They can wrestle or announce

Up to 6 Titles

Announcers
1. Gorilla Monsoon
2. Bobby Heenan
3. Jesse Ventura
4. Jim Ross

Managers
Sunny
Elizabeth
Beaulah
Francine
Stacy Kiebler
Paul Heyman

Titles
World
Intercontinental
Television
Women's
Hardcore
Tag Team

Dream Roster-All in their primes, Women First
1.Victoria
2. Molly Holly
3. Trish Stratus
4. Fabulous Moolah
5. Wendi Ritcher
6. Madusa
7. Sensational Sherri
8. Jazz
9. Trinity
10. Alexis Laree
11. Hulk Hogan
13. Bret Hart
14. Undertaker
15. Shawn Michaels
16. Kurt Angle
17. Chris Benoit
18. Ric Flair
19. Scott Hall
20. Marty Jannetty
21. Randy Savage
22. Tito Santana
23. Koko B. Ware
24. Kevin Nash
25. Crush-Kona Crush
26. Ax
27. Smash
28. Hawk
29. Animal
30. Jim Niedhart
31. Andre the Giant
32. Bruno Sammartino
33. Ahmed Johnson
34. Raven
35. Junkyard Dog
36. Kerry Von Erich
37. Eddie Guerrero
38. Dean Malenko
39. Chris Jericho
40. Mr. Perfect
41. Rick Martel
42. British Bulldog
43. Jake Roberts
44. Jimmy Snuka
45. Ricky Steamboat
47. Roddy Piper
48. Kevin Nash
49. Rick Rude
50. Steve Austin

SWF Main Event 10/4/03
SWF MAIN EVENT

Extreme: Welcome to the 1st edition of SWF Main Event! Tonight we decide the title holders to the other SWF titles, being the United States, Television, Hardcore, Tag Team, and 6 Man Tag.

Vance: Those in the U.S., TV, and Hardcore matches were chosen at random. For the traditional and 6 mans, we left it up to the SWF superstars to find partners.

Here's the Breakdown of the matches:
SWF U.S. Title 4 way Elimination - The Freedom Fighter vs Tony Ramon vs Quow Ling vs The Shadow

SWF TV title 3 way Elimination- JuJu vs Mercenary vs Capt. Fantastic

SWF Tag Team 4 team Elimination- Suicide Bros. vs Reverend/Xavier vs Jaffe/Joe $ vs Silkky/Randy

Hardcore Title- Boppo vs The Janitor

6 man tag titles- X/Disco/Jimmy vs Petey/Octane/Yeti

Vance: It appears as if some important alliances have been made, we've got footage to show you how the teams came to be, but we kick the night off with the Hardcore title match! Now there's no 24-7 rule, however if a champion is still in the ring , or they agree to a match anywhere with an SWF referee to preside, anyone can have a shot at the title.


SWF Hardcore Title Match- Boppo The Clown vs The Janitor
Before we even get started, Rory Rogers (who didn't get a title match in the random drawing) rushes in. Boppo uses the distraction and uses a TRICYCLE on The Janitor! When he goes for the pin, Rory breaks it up and tries to win himself! Boppo pulls him off, and they argue until The Janitor recovers and sneaks outside as they argue. He grabs his mop from the ringer, and hits Boppo in the face with it, splashing something in his eyes that apparently burns. Rory is next, as The Janitor hits him several times until the mop breaks! Janitor goes out side again, and grabs a Dustbuster! He cracks in the head with it as both men strive to recover, Boppo is still blinded BTW. Janitor pins a bloodied Boppo for the win.
*Winner and First SWF Hardcore Champion* The Janitor

(Back to announcers)

Extreme: With the Tag Team titles about to be decided, let's show you how the teams came to be. Obviously the Suicide Brothers are related and came here as a team, but what about Reverend and Xavier? Look at this footage to see.

(Roll video of Reverend sitting in the back, reading the bible, as Xavier walks in)

Xavier(smiles as he sees Reverend reading the bible): The good book huh?

Reverend(smiles backs, then closes the book to talk): Oh yes my brother, read it every day.

Xavier(nods head): Your about the only righteous person I've met in the SWF, say, how about joining forces, you know cleaning up the wretched filth of this company?

Reverend(Stands and shakes Xavier's hand): I'd be delighted, we can start by winning the Tag Team titles tonight.

(Fade back to announcers as the duo walk away discussing their future plans)

Extreme: How about that folks? They're quite the team, I'll call them "Faith and Devotion".

Vance(chuckles): Nice. And judging by our next clip, Jahalaman Jaffe and Joe Money aren't the only ones in their alliance, they also have the SWF champion, The Billion Dollar Man as well...

(Fade to Jaffe, Joe $, & BDM talking in the backstage area)

Jaffe(to Joe): Wow, that's quite a lucrative business.

Joe: Yeah, just `cause a man makes money on the streets doesn't mean he's not a savvy industrialist.

BDM(to Joe): I concur. It's nice to be able to have an intelligent conversation with other sophisticated people like you gentlemen. I say we consolidate our power, and team up, us three together? Nobody could stop us.

Jaffe(nods in agreement): Sounds good. (to Joe) why don't we tag together tonight and take home the Tag Team titles?

Joe: Absolutely!

(The three laugh it up as we go back to the announcers)

Vance(to Extreme): I think they should be called "Cash Inc."

Extreme(nods): Cash Inc.? I like it! But what about this next teaming of Randy Mann and Silkky Smooth?

(Fade to Silkky and Randy in a hot tub with several ladies)

Silkky(to Randy): You are an ok guy, and the ladies love you, I think we'd make a great tag team!

Randy(responds): And with the SWF Tag titles, we'll be even better!

(The two toast champagne as we go back to the announcers)

Extreme(to Vance): How about "Porn and Pimpin?"

Vance(laughs): That'll work, but now, we see which team will win the titles.

(Fade to match)

4 Team Elimination SWF Tag Team Title Match- Suicide Bros. vs Faith and Devotion vs Cash Inc vs Porn and Pimpin'
Jack Suicide and Xavier start out, and Xavier controls, until Jack makes a big comeback and tags Randy Mann. Disgusted, Xavier tags to Reverand, who dominates. Randy manages to tag Silkky who cleans house, also beating on Xavier, who ran in to save his partner. Silkky allows Reverend to tag Xavier, and after a Silkky Slam, F&D are out. Not happy, Xavier nails Silkky with his "Code of Ethics" book as Reverand uses the bible on Randy outside. Jaffe quickly rushes to replace the outed man, and pins Silkky. Both Suicide Brothers climb the top rope and launch themselfs, Jack at Joe $ on the apron, Mike at Jaffe in the ring. Meanwhile, F&D are brawling down the aisle with Porn and Pimpin'. It's chaos, and as the ref is distracted by the fighting outside, Jaffe wraps some gold necklaces he wore to the ring around his fist and clocks Mike. The ref turns to see Jaffe's attempted pin, and Jack breaks the count at two, when he comes off the top with the Suicidal Splash on Jaffe, also squishing his brother! Jack pulls himself up, only to fly back out to the floor onto Joe, who was recovering from the fray there. Mike, saved by his brother, but still hurt, manages to roll over to a prone Jaffe and pick up the win! That is quite the upset!
*Winners and NEW SWF Tag Team Champions* The Suicide Brothers

(Fade back to the announcers)
Vance: What a match! Who'd have thought the Suicide Brothers would pull it off? Next up, is an interview segment, hosted by Petey Pizzazz that he calls "Petey's Parlor". Take it away when your ready Petey!

(Cut to the designated interview setup, off to the right of the aisle, set up on a platform. It's an elaborate stage, made to look like an upscale salon)

Petey(smiling): Welcome one and all to Petey's Parlor! Today we have a VERY special guest, it's someone that you all might be interested in hearing from, and I have some questions for. Please Welcome, OCTANE!
(Octane's music plays as he makes his way to the set)

Petey(holding the mic to Octane): So, at SWF: Genesis, YOU caused ME, YOUR employer to be eliminated from the World title battle royal. I thought we had a deal, your job is to protect ME, not look out for yourself. What do you have to say?
(Octane just glares at Petey)

Petey(annoyed): Oh yeah, Mr. Silent. Fine, don't answer me. But remember, we have a shot at the 6 Man titles, so you better get you head straight. Speaking of which (reaches up to touch Octane's hair) you should really let me fix this for you...(Octane grabs his hand, and Petey cries out in pain)

Petey(in pain, still in Octane's grip): FINE! PLEASE LET GO! I'M SORRY! (Octane lets go) Ok, (shakes hand in pain) I guess that's it, see you next time on Petey's Parlor, back to you guys.

(Back to the announcers)

Vance: Ok, up next is the Elimination match for the TV title...(Vance looks offstage to someone signaling him)

Extreme(confused): Vance, what's going on?

Vance: Something is going on backstage, I don't know.....(the camera cuts to a pile of bloody security guards laying unconscious at the arena's parking lot entrance. The camera pans to see the dark shadow of a man making his way to the locker room area)

(Back to the announce booth)

Extreme(angrily to Vance and the production people): That's definitely Death Machine, I don't care what you say, I'm gonna go back there and personally toss his ass from the building. (Vance and the crew are physically trying to restrain Extreme and quietly try to talk him into staying put, they finally convince him to sit)

Vance(to the crew): Just get that animal out of here, call more security or whatever, we have a show to do.

Extreme(to the crew): Make sure he's gone, long gone. If you can't or won't I'll go, that (beeped out) will NOT get away with this (more beeping).

Vance(trying to recover from the commotion): Sorry folks, we have a major problem here, as you can obviously see. Moving on though, the TV title is on the line next.

(Back to the ring for the match)

SWF TV title 3 way Elimination Match- The Great JuJu vs The Mercenary vs Captain Fantastic
In this match, all three men fight at once. Mercenary knocks both challengers down with a hard double clothesline right off the bat to take control. Fantastic rebounds and he and Mercenary engage in a slugfest and a test of strength, and the odd man, JuJu takes a rest outside. JuJu snags his magic bag and withdraws something contained in a bowl of some kind. The men in the ring continue to go back and forth, but JuJu rushes in and throws his right hand out dramatically as Fantastic is running off the ropes towards him, and nothing happens. The two collide, and Mercenary continues the assault on Fantastic, leaving JuJu on the canvas. JuJu recovers and stares at his right hand, even yelling at it, and suddenly a ball of fire rises from his hand and into his face! He had a piece of flash paper, that didn't go off when he wanted concealed in it! JuJu is writhing in pain on the mat, so Mercenary leaves a downed Fantastic to pin JuJu, eliminating him. When Mercenary returns to Fantastic, he immediately lifts him for the Mercy Kill. However, in the vertical suplex position of the move, Fantastic shifts his weight, and ends up on his feet behind Mercenary. Fantastic spins his opponent, and quickly picks him up to hit the Crime Stopper! 1-2-3, it's over
*Winner and NEW SWF Television Champion* Captain Fantastic

(Cut to a camera, rushing down the locker room corridor, before stopping at a doorway, and the focuses on a mangled door, seemingly ripped of the hinges, which lays in front of the room. The name on the door reads "Extreme Superstar". The camera slowly enters what is now identified as Extreme's office to see it torn apart, and the bloody bodies of more security piled against the farthest wall. The camera suddenly pans up the wall to reveal a message, seemingly written in the blood of the downed men, that simply reads "DIE".)

(As we ready to cut out, the camera man suddenly cries out, and is punted into view by someone who kept hold of the camera. Then the camera suddenly is thrown across the room and goes out before turning back on. It is now facing the entrance and catches the shadow and lower part of a man walking out.)

(Back to the announcers, where Extreme's chair is spinning empty and he is seen rushing to the ring)

Vance(pale faced and worried): This....It's not safe.....I honestly don't understand what the hell is going on. Quite frankly, with that....that..... man running around doing who knows what kind of damage to those poor people, I'm scared. I'm not a big guy, I don't know how to fight, and Extreme, he's my friend, I don't want to see him get hurt. He's giving up over a hundred pounds and about a foot and a half, and this monster isn't to be messed with. (Extreme, in the ring , with a microphone asks the camera to go to him, and so it does)

Extreme(very pissed, tosses his jacket down in anger, and paces the ring , as if he's preparing to fight): DEATH MACHINE! Get your no good ass out here NOW. I'm not playing. You want me to "DIE"? Well big man, live up to your name and make it happen. (Vance's voice is heard solemnly pleading for Extreme to stop and to get help to ringside) This show goes not one more minute until that man is in this ring. (Death Machine's music blares as Vance screams in anger to have someone stop this. Death Machine Finally marches down to the ring and enters, going right up to Extreme, who while only reaching his abdomen, valiantly stands his ground, shaking in rage and hurling inaudible obscenities at the beast.)

Extreme(into the mic, fully engulfed in his anger): You (long beeping)! Who do you think you are? This is MY company, and your NOT welcomed here. You seem to get by on fear, bigger men than myself have run at the site of you. But I'm not scared of you. (Extreme is right in his face now, overcome by emotion) Look into these eyes you heartless (beeped out), I refuse to run, you want to KILL someone? You REALLY want to try to end someone's life? Listen to that(points to his heart), you hear that? No matter what you do to me, I swear to the almighty himself, you won't EVER be able to stop this heart from beating. You've got your chance, here and now, let's do it. (Extreme tosses down the microphone, but shockingly, Death Machine picks it up to speak)

Death Machine(who's voice is deep and gravelly): I will see fit that you meet your demise. But I have plans, plans so sinister in store for you, that your death will have to wait. I'm making sure that before the maggots have the chance to devour your rotting flesh, you will be equipt with the proper accessories. I'm in the final stages of preparing your coffin and gravestone, and once they are complete....YOU WILL BE LAID TO REST! (Extreme boldly snatches the mic to speak)

Extreme(in a low, serious voice, still not showing fear): Halloween Hell on the 31st, you know how to get here. Not for a match, but a fight. (once again in Death Machine's face) After YOUR demise, I never want to see your (beeped out) face ever again, are we clear?(Death Machine, seemingly amused nods in agreement)

(Extreme drops the mic, then reaches to claim his jacket without incident, then suddenly, Death Machine rushes him, knocking him down with a clubbing blow, then drags him back to the center of the ring before he could leave. From the broadcast booth, Vance screams for help, as the remaining security forces rush the ring , but they all fall victim to attack from the monster. SWF Superstars rush down next, armed with weapons, but are fended off, and now the beast has a big metal pipe in his possession. All the rest of the SWF crew tries to help, but are overpowered by the big man wielding a pipe. Clearing the ring , Death Machine goes outside and grabs the ring steps and tosses them inside. Having seen enough, Vance leaves the booth and runs in with a chair, but only gets in one shot before being disposed of. Now alone with Extreme in the ring , Death Machine kicks him around, so hard that he lifts him a good bit in the air. Extreme continues to try to get up, and has blood gushing from the mouth, a possible sign of internal bleeding. Death Machine backs away with the metal steps in hand and allows Extreme to reach his feet before driving them right into his head. Extreme is now bleeding from his head as well, face down on the mat in a pool of it. Death Machine grabs the pipe and proceeds to wallop his prey with that, until he notices the chair Vance tries to hit him with, laying in the ring. Death Machine lifts his bloody foe and hits his revered Death Warrant chokeslam onto the chair! He repeats this FOUR more times before allowing Extreme to lay on the mat. Extreme is really in bad shape, blood is covering most of his body, and is all over his nemesis as well. Death Machine hoists Extreme up over his head and hurls him a good ten feet down the aisle, where Extreme lands with a sickening thud face down on the steel ramp. He rolls about in pain, leaving a streak of blood behind.)

(A camera man is heard yelling to cut backstage, where we see a pale and disturbed Dean Bokerlund)

Dean(shaking and in a trembling voice): .........I regret to inform the fans here tonight, with practically out whole crew wiped out......We are cutting this broadcast short. The title matches we had will take place at a later date....(suddenly Death Machine, covered in Extreme's blood walks by on his way out of the building) Umm......(sirens are heard in the background) I..... (sighs) I'm sorry, I guess we'll be here next week......I just don't know anymore (a visibly shaken Dean drops the microphone and walks off as we fade out)

END OF SHOW, END OF EXTREME?

My DVD Collection
My DVD Collection as of 10/2/03

Movies/Etc.
1. The Back to The Future Trilogy

2. Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure

3. Bill and Ted's Bogus Journey

4. Blow

5. Boogeymen Killer Compilation- A collection of
great horror movie scenes

6. Chasing Amy

7. Clerks

8. Clerks Uncensored- All six episodes of the short lived Clerks cartoon

9. Dazed and Confused

10. Dogma

11. Go

12. Insomnia

13. Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back

14. Mallrats

15. Oz The Complete First Season

16. Pulp Fiction

17. Real World Season 1

18. Ultimate Fights- A collection of movie's
greatest fight scenes

19. What About Bob?



Wrestling- Forgive the WWE/WWF problem
20. ECW Presents The Best of Cactus Jack

21. ECW Hardcore History- Memorable ECW matches and moments

22. ECW Path of Destruction- Another collection of memorable ECW matches and moments

23. FMW International Slaughterhouse- The crossover event with ECW vs FMW

24. FMW Yokohama Deathmatch- The event featuring a brutal Deathmatch main event

25. WWE Best of Confidential- Confidential is WWE's magazine format show

26. WWF's Funniest Moments

27. WWE Presents Hulk Still Rules- An amazing 2 DVD set highlighting Hulk Hogan's career

28. WWF Invasion- The epic WWF vs WCW/ECW showdown. I was there!

29. WWE Presents NWO Back in Black- It chronicles the history of the notorious NWO stable

30. WWF Rock Bottom: In Your House- WWF's December 1998 PPV offering

31. WWE Presents The Undertaker: This is My Yard- It chronicles wrestling legend, The Undertaker

32.Wrestlemania 18- The 18th installment of wrestling's biggest event, featuring the classic Hogan vs Rock match

33. Wrestlemania: The Insider's Story- A bonus DVD that came with Wrestlemania 18. It has highlights of the event, plus insider comments and exclusive footage

100 Things That Piss Me Off
Intro: Okay, this is all my own Opinion, (and in no real particular order) so don't get too mad if you disagree. If you do like something on this list, I'll let it slide since I probably know you, and I like you just the way you are :)

100 Things/People That Piss Me Off

1. Racists
2. Criminals-Murderers, Pedophiles, Rapists, and the like
3. The TV show "Friends"
4. The TV show "Frasier"
5. Media Sensationalism
6. People who bash me for liking wrestling
7. Bill Goldberg
8. Madonna
9. Conservatives
10. Religious Zealots
11. Tonya from Real World Chicago
12. Abram from Road Rules South Pacific
13. The Fox Executives that canceled John Doe
14. Posers
15. People who prefer to follow instead of do their own thing
16. Punk/Emo Music
17. People who don't admit when they've been hypocritical
18. Death Metal
19. Insensitive bastards who make jokes after a tragedy
20. Immature idiots on internet message boards
21. Sigmund Freud
22. Any Dictator- Hitler, Mussolini, etc.
23. Over-hyped blockbusters that are only sentimental pieces of crap
24. Russell Crowe
25. Commercials that get played too much
26. Songs/Music Videos that get played too much
27. TV Networks that run like 3 episodes of a show, instead of the other entire season's worth they have to choose from
28. TV Networks that show the same 6 movies, even though they have the rights to hundreds
29. The ticket prices for a movie/event
30. The cost of one CD
31. Sleazy entrepreneurs who use a situation/event to jack up prices or sell themed products
32. Liars-BIG liars
33. The military people who keep calling to get me to sign up
34. Inept Boxing Judges
35. Nepotism
36. Internet Pop Up Ads
37. Entertainment Awards being given based on anything but performance
38. Cults and their leaders
39. Trashy and obviously staged Talk Shows
40. People who are corruptible
41. People who give up on their dreams
42. Puff Daddy/P Diddy/whatever
43. Famous people who become icons simply because they died
44. Onions
45. Finding Onions in allegedly Onion-free food
46. Inept Fast Food workers
47. People who take out their anger/frustration on innocent people
48. Telemarketers
49. Killer animals
50. Not being able to find a decent thing on TV, even with satellite
51. Arrogant people
52. People who look down upon those less fortunate
53. Chauvinists
54. Movie makers who prefer to phone it in, and tack on a lazy ending or go the usual route with what could have been a good/unique film
55. People who are overly competitive
56. Insincerity
57. People who cheat on their partners, instead of breaking up
58. Media Whores
59. People who don't shake hands or say "Good game" after competition
60. People older than 10 who have hissy fits
61. Event Security Guards
62. People who drive under the influence
63. People who say things for the sole purpose of pissing you off
64. Country Music
65. Stereotypes
66. Current WWE writers
67. Musicians that "sample" or remake a song under the guise that it's original
68. Editing Movies for Televison
69. TV shows that rely on skin, but yet can only show censored nudity
70. Bastardizing any famous franchise simply for financial gain
71. Roman Polanski
72. Anti-Americans
73. Xenophobes
74. Treating people with certain problems like garbage, instead of helping
75. Bullies
76. Some people's lack of loyalty
77. People who think they're Vampires or other such creatures
78. The TV show "Tough Crowd With Colin Quinn"
79. The TV show "The Man Show"
80. WWE not even mentioning the death of Lou Thez
81. Gold diggers
82. Scott Bakula and/or Dean Stockwell not getting Emmys for their work on Quantum Leap
83. People who spend ridiculous amounts of money to buy accessories for their crappy car
84. People who think they know what's best for me
85. People who watch the TV with the volume too loud
86. People who chew nosily/with their mouth open
87. People who talk too loud
88. The Ultimate Warrior/just plain "Warrior"
89. People who let others walk all over them
90. Anyone who talks to someone like they are stupid
91. Rob Black
92. The fact that WWE saddled Hulk Hogan with a dumb angle that made him leave-Summer 2003
93. Critics who state their opinions as facts
94. The Montreal Screwjob
95. Hugh Grant
96. My Step dad's dog who always runs off with people's stuff
97. Seeing people I like cry
98. The satellite dish going out in not so bad weather, or when the mailman walks by
99. Noisy Neighbors
100. Flat Soda

The SWF Debut Show!
Finally! But first, be sure to read the primer posted previously, so you can learn about all the characters and events!

SWF: Genesis

Live! From the SWF Arena

Your Hosts: Vance McMillian & Extreme Superstar

Vance: Welcome the SWF's premiere event, SWF: Genesis! I'm Vance McMillian along side the man who put this whole thing together, SWF Owner and Announcer Extreme Superstar!

Extreme: Hello Everyone! For the SWF's inaugural show you will see a qualifying tournament featuring the entire roster, the winners are given the chance to enter a battle royal, crowning the first ever SWF World champion! Who will be the inaugural SWF World champ? We'll soon find out!

Vance: This tourney was setup via a random drawing, which makes for some rather interesting matches as you will soon see, here's the matches:

The Mercenary vs The Yeti
Rasslin' Rory Rogers vs The Shadow
Jahalaman Jaffe vs The Janitor
Silkky Smooth vs Crazy Phil
The Don vs The Freedom Fighter
Mike Suicide vs Jimmy Jam
Joe Money vs Randy Mann
Death Machine vs A Local Toughman
Quow Ling vs The Great JuJu
The Reverend vs Tony Ramon
Jack Suicide vs Petey Pizzazz
The Billion Dollar Man vs Disco Danny
X vs Xavier Hawthorne III
Octane vs Tripp
Boppo the Clown vs Captain Fantastic

Extreme: Alright, before these first round matches, each wrestler was interviewed for their thoughts, so prior to the matches, we'll go to their comments, first up is the Mercenary.

(Fade in to Mercenary wringing his hands and pacing back and forth)

Mercenary: Am I supposed to be afraid? I've taken down bigger, scarier things in the jungles of my homeland, so what makes you, Yeti so different. You'll see, by the end of the night, I'll return home with the SWF title to mount on my wall, as well as the head of the Yeti!

(Fade Out, back to the announce booth)

Vance: The Mercenary Sure seems ready, but what about his opponent? Apparently we've got footage of what happened when our crew attempted to speak to Yeti, who as we all know, doesn't speak....

(Fade to Yeti standing in the SWF interview area, growling and pounding his chest)

SWF Camera Guy (off camera): So.....Yeti.....Any words on your upcoming match?

(Yeti charges the camera man, knocking him down, causing the camera to go out, and we cut back to the announce booth)

Vance: Well, there's what they had to say, or in Yeti's case, not say. Now here's the match!

SWF Title Qualifying Match- The Mercenary vs The Yeti
The Mercenary wastes no time rushing the Yeti, he manages to daze the big man and back him into the ropes. His momentum is short lived as the Yeti swats him away, sending him flying across the ring. Yeti simply picks up the Mercenary and delivers the Giant Drop for the quick pin.
*Winner* The Yeti

(Fade into interviews for the next match contestants)

Rory : YEEEEE HAAAW! Shadow you better be ready baby, I'm ready to fight! It's time for this cowboy to trade in his belt buckle for the SWF title!

(Fade out, into Shadow warming up with martial arts moves, silently, then we cut back to the announcers)

Extreme: Ok, now we go to the match!

SWF Title Qualifying Match- Rory Rogers vs The Shadow
Rory comes out fighting , but is met by a barrage of vicious kicks. Shadow manages to knock down Rory, at which point he gets in position to deliver his patented Flying Wizard Kick. As a dazed Rogers makes it to his knees, The Shadow rushes in from a good five feet away to hit his finish and get the pin.
*Winner* The Shadow

Vance- Next up is Jahalaman Jaffe vs The Janitor, and before such an important match, these men had a lot to say.

(Fade into Jaffe laughing)

Jaffe(still laughing): Winning the SWF World title is gonna be easier than I thought! A JANITOR?! Seriously, can't we just cut to the chase and HAND me the title?! (holding up his hands, with big gold rings on each finger) See these? Sure it's a nice amount of gold, (under his breath) for the common man, but at the end of tonight, my waist will also be adorned in it as well!

(Fade out, and into The Janitor, clutching a mop and sneering)

Janitor(yelling angrily): Jaffe! You don't seem to be scared, that's ok. Once we step into the ring , you sure as hell will be! I've spent my entire LIFE putting up with rich pieces of trash like you, but luckily, cleaning up garbage is what I do, BUT I HATE IT! (snaps the mop and tosses it down)

(Back to announcers)

Extreme: They sure seem ready Vance.

Vance(nods in agreement): Indeed. We're gonna find out next though, who's MORE ready.


SWF Title Qualifying Match- Jahalaman Jaffe vs The Janitor
Jaffe thwarts The Janitor's wild offense by using a low blow. The Janitor dominates until Jaffe escapes to the outside where he loads up his right hand with his rings. When The Janitor goes out after him, he's met with the loaded fist, knocking him out cold. Jaffe lifts him back into the ring for the easy three count.
*Winner* Jahalaman Jaffe

Post Match: The Janitor, rightfully angered, grabs his trusty mop and proceeds to whip the unholy crap out of Jaffe before a flock of officials stop him. Jaffe is writhing in pain on the canvas, and needs to be helped to the back.

(Fade into interviews for the next match contestants)

Silkky Smooth(smiling and surrounded by a bevy of women): So Phil, you're supposed to be CRAAAZY? All right, cool, we'll see. But Silkky Smooth ain't about to back down just `cause you allegedly so messed up. When I step into my limo with all these beauties and hit the town, it's gonna be in celebration of my World title victory!

(Fade into Crazy Phil sitting sadly on the curb outside the arena)

Phil(without even lifting his head): Silkky, you talk a big game. But you lack conviction, what are you fighting for? I've got nothing left to do BUT fight. Why do they call me Crazy? I suppose, it's because I show no fear, I do whatever it takes to survive on the streets. Or maybe it's just a mean name given to this old drunk as he staggered down the alleys, looking for his trash bag of belongings. Either way, me and you are gonna fight, in a match, in a qualifying title match. I'm old, and I don't know too many wrestling moves, but make no mistake, I'll try my damndest to win.

(Fade out, back to the announcers)

Extreme(absorbing what was just said): It's time for the match, I'm pulling for you Phil. Go get `em.


SWF Title Qualifying Match- Silkky Smooth vs Crazy Phil
Despite Phil's valiant effort, Silkky squashed him rather quickly after the Silkky Slam.
*Winner* Silkky Smooth

(Fade into interviews for the next match contestants)

The Don(sitting at a card table, fiddling with a deck): I don't have too much to say. But remember this, Freedom Fighter, (Showing a hand of four Aces) I ALWAYS win.

(Fade to the Freedom Fighter, standing atop the SWF arena, in front of the waving flag)

Freedom Fighter: America was built on the freedom to do as you please, however I think our forefathers didn't have the types of activities The Don is a part of in mind. You set a bad example for the youth of this country, and tonight I intend to make an example of YOU Don. The SWF fans will be able to see a TRUE role model in action.

(Fade out, and to the ring)

SWF Title Qualifying Match- The Don vs The Freedom Fighter
The Freedom Fighter completely overpowers The Don and proceeds to nail the Star Spangled Slam for the win.
*Winner* The Freedom Fighter

(Fade into interviews for the next match contestants)

Mike Suicide(sitting in the empty arena before the show): My whole life has been about two things: taking everything to the limit, and being a World champion. The time to combine these things is now, so Jimmy Jam, get ready, I'm coming' at you full throttle, and I ain't stopping till I am crowned the NEW Champion of the world!

(Fade to Jimmy Jam, emerging from his van in the parking lot, with the loud sound of Poison playing in the background)

Jimmy Jam: YEEEEEAH BAAABBBYYYYY! Let's ROCK! Mike Suicide, I'm stoked your so anxious to step in the ring with me dude. I can't wait either, since after I go through you, then win the battle royal, I'll be playing air guitar on my new title belt as my music blast through the arena!

(Fade out, and to the ring)


SWF Title Qualifying Match- Mike Suicide vs Jimmy Jam
The two engage in a pretty intense and fast paced brawl, with many flips, spins, and top rope moves. Jimmy gains control and takes it to the floor, where he is taken down by Mike. Suicide rushes back into the ring , only to come flying off the top rope with a splash on to his opponent, still laying on the outside, earning a big pop from the crowd. The action returns to the ring and after shortly regaining the offensive, Jam is laid out by Mike's Suicidal Twist finisher for the 1-2-3.
*Winner* Mike Suicide

(Fade into interviews for the next match contestants)

Joe Money(walking the streets): Yo, Randy Mann, listen up! Yeah I know you, I've sold some of your movies, and now I know why you wrestle! Anyways, you'll be crawling back to your little movies after I hit The Payoff on yo' ass!

(Fade to Randy Mann relaxing in a hot tub)

Randy Mann: Joe Money, that was a cute little spiel, but you fail to realize, in the wrestling ring , I'm no joke. I've got a new movie in the works you may be interested in Joe, I call it "How Randy Mann whipped Joe Money's ass in the SWF title tournament and went on to win the whole damn thing!"

(Fade out, and to the ring)

SWF Title Qualifying Match- Joe Money vs Randy Mann
Joe rocks Randy with some hard shots and good brawling offense before falling prey to Randy's technical attack. Mann ascends to the top rope and hits the Body Shot for the win.
*Winner* Randy Mann

(Back to announcers)

Vance: We have a very important announcement, regarding the next match. The Toughman thought better of facing Death Machine, so, Death Machine wins by default, and receives a bye, and automatic entry to the battle royal.

Extreme: Also at this time, our colleague, "Clean" Dean Bokerlund will announce the winners of the "SWF Super Family Sweepstakes", take it away Dean!

Dean(in the ring): To mark the debut of the SWF, we ran a contest, searching for one lucky family of wrestling fans to make the trip tonight to see the premiere of the SWF! The winning family was flown in, given first class accommodations, and backstage access to meet these giants of the ring. At this time, I want to introduce them to you all, ladies and gentlemen, from Landover Maryland, The Perkins Family!

(The five family members arrive in the ring)

Dean(to the father): Sir, you have a lovely family here, please introduce yourselves to the people.

The Father: I'm Jerry Perkins, I've brought, (pointing to each family member as their names are said) my lovely wife, Alice, my 15 year old son Richard, my 11 year old daughter, Molly, and our Grandma Mildred. She's actually the biggest fan of us all, she entered us in the contest. It's her birthday today, and she's very excited to celebrate it here.

Dean(smiling): Well, happy birthday Mildred! May I ask how old you are today ma'am?

Mildred: I'm 87 years young Dean, I'm happy be here today, I've been a fan of wrestling since I was a little girl. My daddy took me to...... (Orgy's Opticon blasts across the speakers, cutting her off)

(Death Machine marches to the ring)

Vance(in surprise): I don't have this on my program notes, what's going on?

Extreme(not sure what's taking place): I...Umm....Have no idea .

(As Death Machine menacingly steps over the top rope, Dean and the Perkins family stand frozen in fear)

Dean(trembling): Death Machine, what in the world are.....(Death Machine clocks Dean sending him flying out of the ring as the crowd and the Perkins' scream out in terror)

(Death Machine backs the Perkins' into a corner, and Jerry manages to get his kids out of the ring before the monster knocks him into his wife and Grandma Mildred, leaving them trying to get up from the corner. Death Machine snatches Jerry and hits his dreaded Death Warrant chokeslam! He quickly tosses Jerry to the outside, setting his sights on Alice, who's trying to get poor Mildred up, as she needs a walker to stand and move around. Bravely, Richard escapes the custody of the officials outside the ring and climbs the apron to distract the animal and defend his mother. Unluckily, he's grabbed and tossed in the ring , where he is pushed into Alice. Death Machine, seeing the gathering of officials trying to help Jerry, protect Molly, and rescue an immobile Mildred, leaves the ring and in a few swipes, levels them all with the ring steps, so now the family is without ant help. Local cops rush the aisle, but in a twisted act, Death Machine grabs young Molly, keeping them at bay. Holding Molly under his arm like a toy, he reaches under the ring and grabs some tables, and assembles them as a barricade, blocking the aisle. He's far from done though, he also grabs a gas can, and douses the tables, then withdraws matches from his tights and lights them! Now the Perkins' are trapped, the aisle is plugged with cops, preventing any wrestler or Extreme to intervene, the stunned crowd is flocked to the disturbing scene, right up against the safety rails, and security is rushing to maintain order, stopping a way in through the people. With Jerry unconscious on the arena floor and Alice, Richard, and Mildred in the ring scared out of their minds, Death Machine returns to them, with Molly still in hand. He tosses Molly into Richard, then quickly lifts Alice and administers the Death Warrant! He then discards her over the top rope onto her husband laying outside the ring. He looks around, seeing Mildred crying in the corner, struggling to get up, and Richard consoling scared Molly in front on him. He snatches the kids, grasping their throats, and delivers a double Death Warrant!!!!!! He tosses them on their parents, adding to his sick pile of bodies, and makes his way over to 87 year old Mildred, still attempting to pull herself up or out, anything to escape Death Machine's wrath. Death Machine, with one hand, takes her by the throat and lifts her up into position for the Death Warrant, then NAILS AN 87 YEAR OLD WOMAN WITH IT, ON HER BIRTHDAY! Mildred is then added to the pile, as Death Machine stands, staring at the blazing fire he started. The crowd and the announcers stand in shock, and after several minutes, the fire is extinguished. As help rushes in, Death Machine exits over the railing, and parts the crowd like the Red Sea, as they fear for their safety, exiting the building.

(As medical crews flock to aide the injured family, we go to the announcers, who are sitting in shock)

Extreme(in a quiet, serious voice, having trouble looking at the camera): That... was just sick. Honestly, I still have trouble believing what I saw. It's not important right now, but you can bet Death Machine is out of the battle royal, and is no longer welcome here. (stands, rips off his headset and looks right at the camera, very pissed off) Just try it. Come back, I DARE you coward, just see what happens, you want to chokeslam someone? Try ME. I'm not a defenseless family (Vance reaches up and tries to reason with his angry partner) I wont run. I'm not seven feet tall, or three hundred pounds, but to take me out, you'll have to KILL me. Are you willing to take it that far you (sustained beeping)! Nobody else, YOU, ME, MAN VS.... whatever the hell you are. (Extreme tries to regain composure, and sits down, quietly apologizing)

Vance(also in a serious quiet voice): We'll continue to.....keep you up to date on the Perkins family's condition. Also.....in the spirit of the entertainment business, the show will go on. Our next match pits Quow Ling versus The Great JuJu.

(Fade into interviews for the next match contestants)

(Quow Ling simply stares at the camera, before doing a quick spin kick, almost taking down the cameraman as we fade to JuJu's interview)

Great JuJu(standing in a dark, green lit room): Quow Ling! The dark spirits have spoken, I must sacrifice you, and all others in my way to win the SWF title. It's the only way to appease the powers I serve. Prepare to enter the realm of the unholy, as it will be your final destination! (laughs maniacally as we fade to the match)


SWF Title Qualifying Match- Quow Ling vs The Great JuJu
JuJu dominates the early goings with power moves until being overcome by Quow's barrage of martial arts kicks and chops. When JuJu hits a brutal powerslam, he goes to the corner that he keeps his attire and a mysterious black bag. JuJu withdraws a handful of black powder, but it's kicked into his face by Quow, as a result JuJu falls to his knees. While JuJu recovers, Quow sets up for his Death Kick finisher, and before JuJu can fully get up, he's met with the move, hitting him right in the temple, knocking him out. Quow wastes no time going for the pin and picks up the victory.
*Winner* Quow Ling

(Fade into interviews for the next match contestants)


The Reverend(bible in hand): Tony Ramon! Are you ready for salivation, or are you content to be doomed to eternal damnation? I don't hate you my brother! I only wish to SAVE you! OH YES! GIVE ME THE CHANCE BROTHER! IT'S NOT TOO LATE!

(Fade to Tony Ramon chilling in his nice white Cadillac)

Tony: Yo, you wanna save me? How about shuttin' up then chico. Listen you white collared punk, you gonna get carved up tonight, when I'm done, there's gonna be nothin' left to save of YOU! (Fade out to the match)


SWF Title Qualifying Match-The Reverend vs Tony Ramon
Tony destroys Reverend, and avoids The Reverend's attempt to hit him with the bible. Ramon easily hits The Edge for the victory.
*Winner* Tony Ramon

(Fade into interviews for the next match contestants)

Jack Suicide(pacing the empty ring before the show): Tonight, I put it all on the line. I've got a golden opportunity, and I'm gonna do whatever it takes to walk away the SWF champion!

(Fade to Petey standing in front of a mirror, doing his hair with his bodyguard Octane looming in the background)

Petey(to Octane): Big night tonight O-man! I'm SO ready! All I gotta do is beat Jack Suicide, to get into the battle royal, and the title is sure to be mine! (looks back at Octane) Oh, yeah, you fight Tripp don't you? (sighs) That's in the bag , but about the battle royal...You would toss ME out would you? (looks back again at the menacing Octane) Don't answer that.

(Fade out to the match)

SWF Title Qualifying Match-Jack Suicide vs Petey Pizzazz(with Octane)
Petey takes control at first, but Jack goes to the air and gains control. Octane does his job by tripping Jack as he comes off the ropes. When he gets up, Jack turns to yell at Octane and is rolled up by Pizzazz for a close two count. Jack comes back and is on a roll, after using a running neckbreaker to take down Petey, he goes up top, seemingly to nail the Suicide Splash, but opts to launch himself to the outside on Octane. He gets caught, and as Petey distracts the ref, Octane rams Jack into the ring post then gives him the Empty Tank on the floor! Petey casually goes to toss him in the ring , and instead of just pinning him, he uses the Piece of Pizzazz on him THEN gets the three count.
*Winner* Petey Pizzazz

(Fade into interviews for the next match contestants)

Billion Dollar Man(shuffling a wad of money in his hands): If there's one thing in life I love nearly as much as money, it's gold. Tonight I walk away with a whole lot of it, when I am declared the new world champion! You can take that to the bank!

(Fade to Disco Danny, in a dark room, with only a disco ball lighting it as some 70's music plays in the background)

Disco Danny(moving softly to the music): I feel the groove tonight man! The Billion Dollar Man is gonna have his hands full tryin' to keep me from dancin' my way to the gold daddy!

(Fade out to the match)

SWF Title Qualifying Match-The Billion Dollar Man vs Disco Danny
BDM controls until Danny nearly pulls out the upset several times. Danny goes for the Disco Drop, but BDM smoothly transitions into the Billion Dollar Dream.
*Winner* The Billion Dollar Man


(Fade into interviews for the next match contestants)

X(sitting in the dark): If I win or lose, does it even matter? Leave me alone.

(Fade to Xavier Hawthorne III, standing at a pulpit)

Xavier: X, you're an angry, misguided young man, but your not to blame. I BLAME THE MEDIA! ALL THE SEX AND VIOLENCE YOUR GENERATION HAS BEEN EXPOSED TO, HAS CORRUPTED YOU! I intend to change that, starting tonight!

(Fade out to the match)

SWF Title Qualifying Match-X vs Xavier Hawthorne III
It's pretty back and forth, until X out brawls Xavier. Like Reverend, he carries around a big book, his is titled "The Code of Ethics" and he fails the attempt to hit X with it. X knocks down Xavier and peeks inside the book, whatever he sees gives him an idea, then he drops in on the mat, and administers the X-Factor onto it, and he gets the pin.
*Winner* X

Post Match: Xavier is really out of it, he stumbles around, and grabs his book, but drops it on his foot. He cries out in pain, because there was a BRICK in the book! The fans laugh as he gathers himself and his "book" before leaving.

(Petey Pizzazz rushes to the ring, mic in hand, along with Octane and a referee in tow)

Petey: My man, Octane doesn't have anything to say, you all know he doesn't talk, so let's cut to the chase, Tripp, come out now for the match! (Tripp's theme plays as he runs into the ring)


SWF Title Qualifying Match-Octane vs Tripp
Octane wins with the Empty Tank before Petey can even exit the ring.
*Winner* Octane

(Fade into interviews for the next match contestants)

Boppo The Clown(in front of a Ferris Wheel): I used to think that humor was the key to life, BUT I WAS WRONG! I TRIED TO BRING JOY TO ALL THOSE LITTLE SNOT NOSED BRATS AND THEY STOMPED ON MY SHOES, THEY KICKED ME IN THE SHINS! I was a man who once loved to entertain and make people laugh, NOW I WANT TO HURT! I WANT TO MAKE PEOPLE BLEED! I WANT LITTLE JOHNNY IN THE FRONT ROW TO CRY! And crying is what you will ALL be doing after I beat this "superhero" tonight!


(Fade to Captain Fantastic in his "Fortress of Seclusion")

Cpt. Fantastic: Boppo, you are one of the worst kinds of villains, you once helped make the world a better place, then joined the side of evil! Fear not, citizens, it's my job to dispose of such men, and tonight is no different!

(Fade out to the match)


SWF Title Qualifying Match-Boppo the Clown vs Captain Fantastic
A squash which sees Fantastic put away Boppo with the Crime Stopper rather quickly.
*Winner* Captain Fantastic


(To announce booth)

Extreme: Being one man short of the projected 15, we've added a superstar that wasn't actually scheduled to debut until next week, due to other obligations. Luckily, he was able to make it today, and even though he wasn't added to the drawing for a qualifying match, he gets to work tonight's show.

Vance: His name is Repo, he's a rather unusual, but fun individual as you'll soon see.

Extreme(in a quiet serious voice): Before we go over the participants for the world title battle royal, we have an update on the Perkins family's condition.

Vance(also in the same tone): Jerry suffered a broken neck, and the two children were given concussions as well as some serious neck problems. Alice also suffered a concussion and her neck was badly injured. Mildred unfortunately, was hurt the worst as her, neck was broken, her back was badly thrown out of alignment, and she also broke her hip. Once again, all of us here in the SWF apologize for what happened, and we hope the Perkins' will get well soon.

Extreme(exhales deeply): In our final bout, we'll decide the first ever SWF world champion in a battle royal.

Vance: For those who don't know the rules, all the participants start in the ring at once, the only way to lose is by being tossed over the tope rope and to the floor. Both feet must touch the floor in order to be eliminated, the winner is going to be crowned the NEW SWF champion.

Extreme: Here's the 15 men who will be involved:
Repo
Yeti
The Shadow
Jahalaman Jaffe
Silkky Smooth
The Freedom Fighter
Mike Suicide
Randy Mann
Quow Ling
Tony Ramon
Petey Pizzazz
The Billion Dollar Man
X
Octane
Captain Fantastic


Vance: Ok, time to decide the first ever SWF champion!


SWF World Title Battle Royal
14 men (all but Repo) start off in the ring. The Janitor rushes into the ring with his mop and starts beating on Jaffe! Officials scramble to get the Janitor out of the ring but the damage was done, Randy Mann tosses him out (Elimination #1). The Ultimate Warrior's theme hits and a guy dressed like Warrior runs out! It's Repo! His gimmick is that of stealing other people's gimmicks! After running around shaking the ropes like the Warrior, Yeti knocks him over the top rope (Elimination #2). Seeing their chance, Cpt. Fantastic, The Freedom Fighter, and Mike Suicide work together and toss Yeti out (Elimination # 3). Mike doesn't last long as big Octane tosses him right afterwards (Elimination # 4). Quow Ling and The Shadow battle it out and they both end up going over and out ( Eliminations # 5 & 6). Randy Mann is next, tossed by Billion Dollar Man (Elimination # 7). Silkky is dumped by Tony Ramon, who is then immediately tossed by Petey Pizzazz (Eliminations # 8 & 9). X is then tossed over by Octane (Elimination # 10). Captain Fantastic is next as BDM, Petey, and Octane force him over ( Elimination # 11).

The Final Four- Billion Dollar Man, Octane, Petey Pizzazz, and The Freedom Fighter
The Freedom Fighter is triple teamed, but avoids a boot by Octane which ends up knocking Petey over the top rope (Elimination # 12). Petey isn't happy and jumps on the apron to yell at Octane, so The Freedom Fighter knocks them together, and pushes over Octane (Elimination # 13). BDM was lying in wait, and simply pushes The Freedom Fighter out after he tossed Octane (Elimination # 14).
*Winner and first ever SWF Champion* The Billion Dollar Man

END OF SHOW

NEXT WEEK: We decide the SWF United States, Television, and Tag Team champions! Matches to be posted soon!

The SWF Primer
To prepare for the debut of the SWF, this primer contains all the info you'll need to follow the SWF action.

The SWF Primer

The company was founded by the one and only Extreme Superstar, after he hit the jackpot in the lottery. He used his new found wealth to start up the SWF, purchasing a ring , and even had a small arena he had constructed, which is named the SWF Arena. Next he scoured the globe looking for promising characters and athletes to join his new federation, and he came up with the characters you'll soon read about. After procuring the talent, he got the SWF a TV deal , a show on Saturday nights, known as SWF Main Event. Also he managed to snag a monthly Pay Per View gig, and the shows are as follows:

January: SWF Rumble- Like WWE's Royal Rumble, at this event 30 stars enter an over the top rope battle royal, with the winner getting a World title shot at the company's top event, Extrememania . The rules are that each entrant draws a number before the actual event, the first two start off and every one and a half minutes after, the man who drew the next number enters until all participants are in the match. The only way to be eliminated is to be tossed over the top rope and having both feet hit the floor, the last man in the ring is the winner.

February: No Escape- There are no special set matches added to this show.

March: Extrememania- The SWF's premiere event, where the winner of the Rumble takes on the World Champion.

April: Spring Stampede- There are no special set matches added to this show.

May: Slamboree- There are no special set matches added to this show.

June: Stars and Stripes- An All-American extravaganza held the weekend before the Fourth of July.

July: Beach Blast- Set in an outdoor, tropical location with a beach theme.

August: Heatwave- There are no special set matches added to this show.

September: War Games- The main event is a brutal and bloody two ringed cage match, where the year's hottest rivalries can be settled. There are two teams of five, and like the Rumble each team member draws a number, in this case 1-5. The man who draws #1 for each team start off in the cage, every five minutes after that a new superstar enters the match from alternating teams, the way it's decided which team's second man enters first depends on which team won the coin toss prior to the match. After all ten men are in, the cage is locked until a member of one of the teams surrenders, given the other team the victory.

October: Halloween Hell- Held Halloween weekend, with a theme representing the holiday.

November: Soul Survivor- This event takes after the WWE's Survivor Series matches of old. Most matches on this card are four on four or five on five elimination matches, in which two teams of four or five face off. The match continues until all members of one team are eliminated by any regular means, being pinfall, submission, disqualification, or count out.

December: Starrcade- The extravaganza that closes out the year with a bang.

SWF Characters

Extreme Superstar Owner/Announcer: Extreme simply acts as the figurehead of the SWF, and calls the action for all the events.

Vance McMillian Announcer- Extreme's broadcast partner, who helps him call the action at all the SWF events.

"Clean" Dean Bokerlund- An interviewer who does the occasional backstage and in-ring interviews.

The Wrestlers

Name: The Mercenary

Height: 6'1

Weight: 236 lbs

From: The Jungles of South Africa

Finishing Move: The Mercy Kill- Jackhammer

Theme: Welcome to the Jungle by Guns N' Roses

Bio: Was a member of a South African militant group, when that disbanded he took up work as a hired gun, with his only loyalty being to himself or temporarily to those who pay him to do a job. He also possesses scary strength, and was reputable strong man in his home country.


Name: Raslin' Rory Rodgers

Height: 6'3

Weight: 240 lbs

From: Austin Texas

Finishing Move: The Roundup- A Lifting and Spinning DDT

Theme: Cowboy by Kid Rock

Bio: This good ol' Texas boy is the son of a Rodeo Clown, and is a former three-time Bull Riding Champion himself. He loves a good fight, and excels in knock-down drag-out brawls.

Name: Quow Ling

Height: 5'4

Weight: 188 lbs

From: Osaka Japan

Finishing Move: Death Kick- A brutal knockout kick to the side of the head

Theme: Smack my Bitch Up by Prodigy

Bio: Don't let his small size fool you, he's a dangerous man. He's also rumored to be a member of the Japanese Yakuza, the Orient's answer to the Mafia, and the fact that he is missing part of his pinky finger on one hand (something all members must have, as a sign of unity) doesn't do much to dismiss those rumors. Watching Quow Ling in action is like watching a fight scene in the Matrix, he's simply amazing.

Name: Jahalaman Jaffe

Height: 5'8

Weight: 229 lbs

From: Tabuk Saudi Arabia

Finishing Move: The Arabian Goodnight- Pedigree

Theme: Money, Power, & Respect by The Lox

Bio: Jaffe is the son of privilege, he grew up in a family of Arab royalty and never wanted for anything. When he tuned 18, Jaffe made his way (on a private jet, with a bevy of servants) to America, as he was enamored with our capitalist ideals, and the fact that he wanted to pursue a wrestling career. With his riches, he certainly got the best training available, and it shows. Jaffe also disdains any person who doesn't possess the wealth that he does, making him very few friends with the exception of Joe Money, and The Billion Dollar Man, who he sees as his equals. He has a more conservative ground game, rarely taking it to the floor or the ropes, but that doesn't mean he's above resorting to any dirty tactics to pull out a victory.

Name: The Great Juju

Height: 6'5

Weight: 286 lbs

From: Parts Unknown

Finishing Move: The Juju Driver- Rikishi Driver

Theme: Southwest Voodoo by ICP

Bio: Juju is a very menacing presence, however his reliance on Black Magic usually leaves him on the losing end of a victory. Despite failing on every occasion to get his curses to work, Juju remains insistent that he does have some sort of powers. Just when he seems to be in control of a match, Juju goes for the Voodoo, which appears to be nothing more than pieces of flash paper that he claims is fire shooting from his hands, baby powder that supposedly renders opponents helpless, and smoke bombs that always blind him by going off in his face. Many people feel bad for the guy, thinking he's delusional, and others just laugh. Obviously, The Great Juju is just a regular guy in a silly get-up, but if he ever abandons it, people won't be laughing anymore.

Name: The Reverand

Height: 6'2

Weight: 231 lbs

From: Church

Finishing Move: Divine Intervention- The Final Cut

Theme: Like a Prayer by Madonna

Bio: No, this isn't just a gimmick, he actually was a clergymen, even studying at the Vatican under the Pope! The stress reportedly got to him, and he got WAY too into his studies, condemning everyone to eternal damnation for even the smallest infractions, such as not saying "God Bless You"DIRECTLY after he sneezed. It got to a breaking point and he even told the Pope himself, that he was going to Hell! That of course got him fired and he decided to pursue a career in wrestling, which he's always loved.

Name: Silkky Smooth

Height: 6'4

Weight: 233 lbs

From: Las Vegas Nevada

Finishing Move: Silkky Slam- Rock Bottom

Theme: Pimpology by 2 Short

Bio: Silkky is a flashy, and fun loving individual who runs a highly successful brothel. As many know, it's all legal in Vegas, so nothing can be done to stop him, a fact that has enraged a few of the more righteous SWF talents.

Name: The Don

Height: 6'0

Weight: 243 lbs

From: New York City, New York

Finishing Move: The Hit- Regal Cutter

Theme: Volare by Dean Martin

Bio: We don't want to assume anything , but his name suggests he is involved in less than savory dealings. The Don is a nice enough guy, and laughs off anyone's accusations that he is a part of such things. For all we know, he is just a big Sopranos fan.

Name: Tony Ramon

Height: 6'6

Weight: 256 lbs

From: Miami Florida

Finishing Move: The Edge-Razor's Edge

Theme: Scarface Opening Theme

Bio: Tony is a tough talking street hustler, who fancies himself as a present-day Tony Montana. He also seems to admire former WWF/WWE superstar Razor Ramon, and uses his own version of Ramon's famous "Razor's Edge" which he refers to simply as "The Edge" to finish off his opponents

Name: Mike Suicide

Height: 6'0

Weight: 224 lbs

From: Columbia South Carolina

Finishing Move: The Suicidal Twist-Twist of Fate

Theme: Epic by Faith No More

Bio: Young Mike Suicide, along with his younger brother Jack have dreamed of wrestling superstardom since they were kids, and are looking to earn their keep in the SWF. Mike takes on a very dangerous style, willing to sacrifice his own well-being to be the star he's always dreamed of being. He also is a talented technical wrestler.

Name: Jack Suicide

Height: 6'0

Weight: 218 lbs

From: Columbia South Carolina

Finishing Move: Suicide Splash-Swanton Bomb

Theme: Epic by Faith No More

Bio: Jack is by far the crazier member of the Suicide brothers, and the aerialist of the two. The sort of things he attempts in the ring are so insane, his brother, who normally right there with him, won't even try.

Name: Joe $(Money)

Height: 6'3

Weight: 237 lbs

From: Oakland California

Finishing Move: The Payoff- Snowplow

Theme: California Luv by 2Pac and Dr. Dre

Bio: This man is a notorious Loan Shark and proprietor of many street-side gambling games and bootleg movie retailers. Joe isn't the most honest man, but he is an accomplished street brawler.

Name: Petey Pizzazz

Height: 6'0

Weight: 230 lbs

From: Bel Air California

Finishing Move: Piece of Pizzazz- Diamond Cutter

Theme: I'm Too Sexy by Right Said Fred

Bio: Petey is a fashion guru who works as a fashion designer and stylist in his various self-owned boutiques. While he's rather flamboyant, Pizzazz is one great wrestler who utilizes a mixture of high flying moves with old fashion technical ones. Petey is also touted as being one of the most charismatic SWF superstars.

Name: Death Machine

Height: 7'0

Weight: 341 lbs

From: Unknown

Finishing Move: Death Warrant- Chokeslam

Theme: Opticon by Orgy

Bio: We don't know where he's from, and he never speaks, but we have managed to put some of the pieces of his past together. Apparently, he worked as a gravedigger in Arizona (but we don't know if that's where he's from) where, with his enormous size and strength, he could do the work of several men. One day though, due to a change in management, he was fired and the poor caretaker who had to inform him of this, was laid out cold with a shovel. The impact broke the handle, and even put a sizeable dent in the metal. Not long after though, Extreme entered the area in his search for SWF superstars, where the seven footer walked in and laid waste to four other candidates in the ring with the most brutal Chokeslams Extreme claims to have ever seen. So with that, Extreme grabbed a contract and asked him to sign, he did, writing the name "Death Machine". Amazingly, this masked monster has never uttered a sound, not a word, cough, sneeze, or even the occasional in-ring grunt.

Name: The Billion Dollar Man

Height: 6'2

Weight: 246 lbs

From: Originally Boston Massachusetts, but now resides in a number of his seasonal homes

Finishing Move: The Billion Dollar Dream- The Million Dollar Dream

Theme: Money For Nothing by The Dire Straights

Bio: He seems to have modeled himself after his wrestling idol, "The Million Dollar Man" Ted Dibiase, but he does fit the character. The Billion Dollar Man is actually a very rich man, even over the billion he brags of, a fortune he acquired through the stock market. These days he keeps exclusive company and disdains those who don't share his wealth, but that wasn't always the case. Once known by his given name, Paul Andrews, he grew up in the rough South Boston Area with a lower income, but loving family. Paul longed for more, hoping one day he'd never have to worry about money again. Such a lifestyle depressed Paul, and he abused alcohol heavily from his teen years until his mid twenties, when he turned his life around. Determined, he worked three separate jobs to put himself through college, where in some economics classes, he found his talent for the stock market. So talented was Paul, he was transferred to Boston University where he graduated. Not long after graduation, his skills won him a nice little job as a stockbroker, before he began a meteoric rise to Wall Street, and hasn't looked back since.

Name: Randy Mann

Height: 6'3

Weight: 243 lbs

From: Hollywood California

Finishing Move: The Body Shot- Money Shot

Theme: Let's Talk About Sex by Salt and Peppa

Bio: As the name suggests Randy Mann is indeed a star of adult cinema, but even the most devout fans of skin flicks would probably fail to recognize him. Randy was just like any other Hollywood hopeful, looking to make it big as a movie or television star. Like many others, he was lost amongst a sea of many more failed stars, but would rebound by turning to the seedier side of Hollywood. Randy gave the booming adult film industry a shot, where he also failed to make a big splash, but found work on the lower level of the business. His work is what you'd find at dirty flea markets or peddled in alleys out of the back of vans, but that doesn't mean he isn't the hardest working man in porn. Randy manages to crank out around 47 films a year, most of which he writes himself. His most popular works are undoubtedly those in the "Randy Mann's Private Party" series, of which there have been 112 made, with more possibly on the way. Randy prefers a scientific style of wrestling, and is only getting better as time progresses.

Name: Disco Danny

Height: 6'0

Weight: 234 lbs

From: New York City, New York

Finishing Move: The Disco Drop- The One and Only

Theme: Shake Your Booty by K.C. and the Sunshine Band

Bio: Disco Danny, while not old enough to have fully enjoyed the 70's, is certainly enamored by the decade. Danny owns and operates a record store, at which the era he loves, is alive and well. Danny favors light technical wrestling with street-style brawling.

Name: Jimmy Jam

Height: 6'1

Weight: 230 lbs

From: Los Angeles California

Finishing Move: The Rocker Dropper- The move of the same name

Theme: Nothin' But a Good Time by Poison

Bio: Jimmy Jam and Disco Danny seem to be kindred spirits. They both own record shops that appear to be trapped in a time warp, honoring their favorite decade, in Jam's case, the 80's. Also they share similar ring styles, which may explain their teaming as well as their friendship. Jimmy Jam's knowledge of 80's metal is unmatched, and neither is his collection of 80's era concert shirts, (which are part of his ring attire) and a bevy of other merchandise from the same time period.

Name: X

Height: 6'0

Weight: 228 lbs

From: Seattle Washington

Finishing Move: The X-Factor- Move of the same name

Theme: Heart Shaped Box by Nirvana

Bio: X makes up the third part of the SWF superstars who are a throwback to a different time, and for X, that's the era of early 90's grunge. Born Scotty Phillips, X was raised in a wealthy family, residing in Pine Bluffs Wyoming. Tired of the preppie clothes and materialistic lifestyle, as a teen he took off to Seattle where he changed his name to X, and became drawn into the grunge movement. Sure, his stake in the family business (meat manufacturing) is what has paid for everything , but he stays true to the movement. X isn't a high flyer, but wrestles fast paced brawls, with moderate scientific moves tossed in.

Name: The Freedom Fighter

Height: 6'2

Weight: 248 lbs

From: Washington D.C.

Finishing Move: The Star Spangled Slam- Angle Slam

Theme: Born In The USA by Bruce Springsteen

Bio: The Freedom Fighter comes from a long line of policeman, firefighters, and war veterans, and takes great pride in the greatest damn country in the world, the United States of America . A former park ranger himself, The Freedom Fighter will go to any lengths to defend the honor of his country, and does so in the ring using his world-class technical and even brawling skills. He's rather big , but is even stronger than his 6'2 248 lbs frame would suggest, The Freedom Fighter could get a 400 lbs man up for his finisher a lot easier than many would believe.


Name: Xavier Hawthorne III

Height: 6'0

Weight: 230 lbs

From: Danbury Connecticut

Finishing Move: The Morality Kick- Superkick

Theme: Losing My Religion by R.E.M.


Bio: Xavier Hawthorne III is a long time wrestling fan, however due to the risque nature of today's wrestling programming , he became fed-up with it, deciding to take action himself as a defender of all he feels in right and just. It may sound noble, but Xavier is a zealot who's version of ethics are far more strict than most of us. He refuses to engage in any sort of hardcore, ladder, cage, or any other match he sees as being excessively violent. Hawthorne wrestles a clean, mat-based match, keeping in line with his position on the business.

Name: Crazy Phil

Height: 6'1

Weight: 234

From: Has no home

Finishing Move: The Crazy Crusher- Unprettier

Theme: What It's Like by Everlast

Bio: Phil's story is a sad one, the life long fan once had a family and a nice home, but lost it all to alcohol and gambling. Upon his wife and two kids leaving , and having his house foreclosed, Phil sunk deeper into his depression and vices. Eventually, after living on the streets, without money to support his habits, he broke down and was admitted to the psych ward at a local hospital, what was his hometown of Portland Oregon. The experience changed, and possibly saved his life, and he got a job down at the docks until fate intervened. Extreme brought his search for stars to the area, and Phil just had to go and try out. Wrestling was all that Phil had left in life that he enjoyed, so he gave it all he had. Phil is an older man, in average shape for a man his age, and not very skilled, however Extreme was so impressed by the sheer heart and emotion Phil exhibited, he signed him, even trained with him to make him a better athlete. He may not be all that great in the ring , but as said above he gives everything in his body and soul, fighting for his very life, striving to pick up the pieces of his shattered existence.


Name: Octane

Height: 6'10 ?

Weight: 328 lbs

From: Detroit Michigan

Finishing Move: Empty Tank- Jackknife Powerbomb

Theme: N.I.B. by Ozzy Osbourne

Bio: Octane is the silent ex-trucker/bouncer from the Motor City, brought in by Petey Pizzazz to act as his bodyguard. Octane made a strong impression during his SWF tryout with his great brawling ability, strength, and speed for such a big man. His Empty Tank finisher rivals any other powerbomb in the business.


Name: The Janitor

Height: 6'0

Weight: 232

From: Chicago Illinois

Finishing Move: The Clean Sweep- The Stroke

Theme: F*ck The World by The Insane Clown Posse

Bio: This man got his start after getting a gig cleaning up wrestling training facilities, and training in the ring after everyone left. He eventually signed up and became a good brawler, which most who've seen him attribute to his very violent temper. The man is just pissed off at everyone for his station in life, it was that bitterness which may have secured him a job, for Extreme liked the anger in his promos and ring work.


Name: Tripp

Height: 6'0

Weight: 226 lbs

From: Milwaukee Wisconsin

Finishing Move: The Stoner Smash- Jumping Tornado DDT

Theme: Don't Like The Drugs But The Drugs Like Me by Marilyn Manson

Bio: When this lazy stoner finally got the boot from his parents' house, he pursued wrestling. He sharpened his skills enough to land a job with the SWF, his style of choice is a more fast-paced match.


Name: The Shadow

Height: 5'9

Weight: 190

From: Tokyo Japan

Finishing Move: The Flying Wizard Kick- Same as name implies

Theme: None

Bio: The Shadow comes to the ring in plain black wrestling gear, even wearing a mask and gloves, concealing his identity. He's another silent individual with a style eerily reminiscent of another SWF star, Quow Ling , who The Shadow stalks silently. Is there a connection between the two? Maybe one day, we'll find out the answer.


Name: Boppo the Clown

Height: 6'2

Weight: 260 lbs

From: The Circus

Finishing Move: The Last Laugh- Sitting Front Suplex

Theme: Psycho Circus by Kiss

Bio: This rotund clown once brought joy to many children, but now just wants to hurt people. He says he was simply tired of dealing with obnoxious kids all the time. His interesting character is what drew interest the Boppo, but he is a decent brawler and does his best work in hardcore matches.


Name: Repo

Height: 6'1

Weight: 233

From: Unknown

Finishing Move: Steals one from a famous wrestler

Theme: Steals a famous wrestling theme

Bio: He's called Repo since he steals the personality, moves, wrestling gear, and music of famous wrestlers. Repo has no distinguishing characteristics of his own, but the gimmick of copying a famous wrestler is good for a laugh, so he got a job in the SWF.


Name: Yeti

Height: 7'7

Weight: 500 lbs

From: Mysterious Origin

Finishing Move: Giant Drop- Rydien Bomb

Theme: None

Bio: The man is 7'7 500 lbs! That's why he got hired! He is just amazingly large and menacing , how could Extreme pass up on this beast. Yeti doesn't speak, but growls, and we don't know why he hides under a giant fur suit with a weird mask that has red eyes, but who's gonna tell him to take it off?


Name: Captain Fantastic

Height: 6'3

Weight: 254 lbs

From: Unknown

Finishing Move: The Crime Stopper-TKO

Theme: Hero by Chad Kroeger and Josey Scott

Bio: Maybe the years of running a comic book store has had some mental affect on him, since he feels that he is a superhero, only in the SWF to rid it of evil. He is in great shape though, with superior strength and surprising speed, with a good variety of technical ability as well. He combines those attributes to make him quite the well-rounded individual, who said comic nerds were all un-athletic?

My Bio: The Conclusion!
Well, finally I've gotten around to sit down and finish my bio, which was started in the first entry on the blog , here it is, enjoy.

When we last left off, I had just engaged in an all out war with my nemesis, Mrs. Shetler, that being near the end of seventh grade. The rest of that year finished rather uneventfully, with the exception of becoming friends with the rest of the initial EGWF crew. It was the next year that we actually started the EGWF, we came up with the name initially a joke name meaning Extremely Gay (as in stupid) Wrestling Federation. One simple match started it all, a tag match at User's house, that was supposed to determine the Tag Champions, but ended in controversy. The team of User and Corky took on Spanky and myself, but when me and Spanky double pinned Corky, it was determined unfair and we were disqualified, but walked away with a moral victory. With no champs determined, we looked to our upcoming trip to our nation's capital, Washington D.C. to decide who were the champions. On the first of a two night tour, due to some no shows and scheduling conflicts, only User, Spanky, and myself were there to compete, and us three had a match, and the man that took the fall would be the loser, leaving the other two as tag champs. The legendary team of SaTINN was formed when I turned on my ally, Spanky to team with User and win the gold. On night two, Spanky snagged a partner in Corky to take on the champs, in two separate matches, but lost both times. Upon the return to Ohio, the wheels were set in motion to actually make the EGWF a full fledged promotion, and a group of us, User Friendly, Spanky/Wigger G/Mr. G, Pinky/Wigger T, Corky, Beatley, and myself started planning the first supercard. It was to take place at Spanky, A.K.A. Aaron's birthday party, and would determine the champs for the other titles, being the World, Intercontinental, Hardcore, European, and Gay as Charged belts, also featuring a tag title defense and a grudge match. The title matches were as followed: The World title would be decided in a tournament, Spanky vs Corky for the IC (Intercontinental) belt, User vs Corky in a ladder match, with me (Extreme Superstar) as a referee, Extreme Superstar vs a mystery opponent for the European title, Extreme Superstar vs Pinky for the Gay as Charged title, and SaTINN vs the Fat Express (Pinky and Spanky) for the tag belts. Also in a non-title showdown we had an "I Cry" match with Spanky vs Pinky, with guest referee Corky. For the benefit of you, the reader, I'll recap the show below:

EGWF PRESENTS: GAY AS CHARGED- 3/6/99, FROM PERRY OHIO

The show begins with a message from Extreme Superstar, (ME!) Informing the viewers of a disturbance that took place before the show, you see, a few punk kids tried to disrupt the event, and the EGWF crew beat them up, including myself picking one of them up and tossing him on to the other. They threatened revenge, so we covered our bases by alerting the viewers in case something happened, so they's understand what was going on. Thankfully, the whole show goes off without incident.

MATCH 1: FOR THE EGWF HARDCORE TITLE - USER FRIENDLY VS CORKY: HARDCORE LADDER MATCH W/ SPECIAL GUEST REFEREE EXTREME SUPERSTAR

HISTORY: These were the two best candidates for the Hardcore belt, so they got the shot and agreed to the stipulations. Extreme(for the record, that's me!) was referee since User knew Spanky and his new ally Pinky were gunning for him, and needed someone he could trust, and didn't have heat with Corky, ensuring a fair match.

THE MATCH: It is the only match of the card taking place outside, being March, it's still snowing and cold as hell. Weapons are scattered around the area, and the ladder is set under a big tree, where the belt hangs. I must note that Corky comes out in his "Corky Mask" a dumb, black executioner-type mask, which comes off quicky, and not worn again for the remainder of the night. The two go at it, in a wild brawl with plenty of weapon shots, one that nearly knocks out User, until, as expected Pinky runs in. But instead of taking out User or Extreme, he attacks Corky, allowing User to grab the belt for the win. Spanky, must've sent out Pinky to destroy Corky, so he'd have an easy IC title match later. In the post match interview, all hell breaks loose as Corky returns for revenge and is LAID OUT by a wicked spear from Extreme.

MATCH 2: FOR THE EGWF EUROPEAN TITLE EXTREME SUPERSTAR VS ???

HISTORY: Seeking revenge, Spanky had set up a mystery opponent to take on Extreme.

THE MATCH: There wasn't one. The mystery man chickened out, so Extreme wins by forfeit, becoming the Euro champ.

MATCH 3- NON TITLE "I CRY" MATCH: SPANKY VS PINKY W/ SPECIAL GUEST REFEREE CORKY

HISTORY: Spanky had been saying he made Pinky cry before during a match, a claim disputed by Pinky. So they decided to have a match to settle the issue, the first to cry is the loser.

THE MATCH: The two pretend to fight then attack Corky, screwing us all of the anticipated bout. Obviously, both are disqualified.

MATCH 4- FOR THE EGWF GAY AS CHARGED TITLE: EXTREME VS PINKY

HISTORY: Pinky, being quite large, about 230 (at the time, he's no longer big) figured he could take Extreme in a match, and cut promos for the fight, declaring himself the "Pink as Charged" champion and that he'd beat Extreme. Extreme said "Rename the title after the event: Gay as Charged, and let's put it on the line and find out who's the real champion". So the title was made and the match signed.

THE MATCH: The two lock up, and Extreme goes for a takedown, both men fall, Pinky BREAKS HIS COLLARBONE! And Extreme pins him, all in 12 seconds! Extreme now has three titles, and is in the tournament for the World title later on, can he be stopped? Also as a result, Pinky is out of the Tag match and the World title Tournament. This is a classic EGWF moment, still talked about today.

MATCH 5- FOR THE EGWF INTERCONTINENTAL TITLE: SPANKY VS CORKY

HISTORY: Many personal issues needed to be settled and they did that in this contest. Also, this is the infamous "Boston Massacre", another "Classic" moment in EGWF history. I really don't want to get into it here, so if you want the details, email me at Hulkster316@msn.com .

THE MATCH: A long , grueling contest that ended when Spanky damn near broke Corky's back in a version of the Boston Crab, and also where the "Massacre" took place.

MATCH 6- EGWF WORLD TITLE TOURNAMENT MATCH 1: USER FRIENDLY VS CORKY

HISTORY: This is the first of three matches to determine the first ever EGWF champ. The winner takes on the winner of Spanky vs Extreme in the title match.

THE MATCH: Resident EGWF Official Beatley obviously has his own agenda, as he disrupted the match on several occasions, attacking User, eventually giving him the DDT, which led to Corky pinning him in a quick count.

MATCH 7- EGWF WORLD TITLE TOURNAMENT MATCH 2: EXTREME SUPERSTAR VS SPANKY

HISTORY: The second of three matches in the title tourney, the winner advances the finals vs Corky. Also by this point Extreme holds one half of the Tag Team titles, the European title, and the Gay as Charged championship.

THE MATCH: Referee Beatley seems to have it out for Spanky, as he distracts him, allowing Extreme to hit the Berrios Bomb, his version of the Pedigree, and get the victory. Extreme is now one match away from being the first World champion, and also in the process holding four titles at once.

MATCH 8- THE EGWF WORLD TITLE TOURNAMENT FINALS: CORKY VS EXTREME SUPERSTAR

HISTORY: This is the match to determine the first EGWF World champion. Extreme is also on quite the roll going in to this thing.

THE MATCH: A clean, no controversy match that sees Extreme use the Perfect Plex/Fisherman's Suplex and score the win and the title. What a night for Extreme, he now holds for belts at once, all of which he's the first champ for, beat the odds by destroying Pinky in 12 seconds, and has yet to be pinned. That right there, is what ushered in the Extreme Superstar era, and made a legend.

After the big event, the EGWF was riding high, and Extreme Superstar was at the helm, until the fateful day in which I was SCREWED out of the gold. In a ladder match for both the World and Hardcore titles, I grabbed the Hardcore title and dropped the World as I fell from the ladder, where my opponent, User Friendly (we were still tag champs but feuding as well) seized the gold. After the incident a rift was created between myself and the EGWF, so I left the organization, and formed the TWF. TWF pioneered the trampoline wrestling industry, with Extreme leading the way, plus world-class talents such as Shasta McNasty and Dusty Streets, TWF was a smashing success. However, I opted to drop the Extreme Superstar name, and took the moniker of Chicken Neck. Chicken Neck is a weird name, but it gets your attention, which is why I lifted from a skit on the Insane Clown Posse's Riddlebox CD. I took to using a devastating Figure Four Leglock I called the "Chicken Plucker". I teamed with Shasta McNasty, forming the Nasty Necks, but soon I decided a character overhaul was necessary, and found a new name in yet another ICP skit, this one from the Amazing Jeckel Brothers album. So it was goodbye Chicken Neck, hello Mo Styles, the flashy and well-dressed alter ego of yours truly. I kept the Figure Four, renaming it the "Styles Lock" and added a vicious Deathlock-style submission named the "Alabama Twister". But the most dangerous addition was the almighty Legdrop, as used by my hero Hulk Hogan, which nobody ever could kick out of. My alliance with Shasta remained as well, and we added his brother, the Hardcore Legend, Dusty Streets, a stable known as McStyles. We ran roughshod over all challengers, so much so that my deadly, (but perfectly legal) Figure Four was banned! Since everyone started breaking the rules, I made a surprise run-in during a Women's title match, being held under an open challenge and won the title. Being in charge of the company, we ruled it ok, so I wrestled and lost it, (laying down for someone to take the gold, or course) all together three times, and was the greatest Women's champ ever. The crowning moment of the promotion had to have been the huge summer spectacular they put together at Madison Circle Garden. We had grudge matches and settled scores, also in the biggest shocker of the night, Extreme Superstar's music struck up, as he was revealed as the huge surprise planned. The legend lived again as he rushed to the ring and decimated his opponent as the crowd gasped in shock, then bursted into a giant standing ovation. Not long after however, I was forced to move, which effectively killed the promotion, and left my whole career in question. So here I sat in Mayfield Ohio, without anywhere left to go, until May of this year. During an EGWF event a car came cruising down the street, blaring Hulk Hogan's theme Song , Real American. In an amazing moment, Extreme Superstar emerged, ending a three year hiatus from the company. Many experts said that with the bad blood between myself and the EGWF, you'd never see me wrestle, or even show up there again. That day, in my return match, I got to beat User Friendly, vindicating a loss that had haunted me for the past three years. Also, in another fantastic moment, I was the first man inducted into the EGWF Hall of Fame. I've been kind of a recluse as of late, but I guarantee you, when I return, I'll send shockwaves throughout the wrestling business.

More about me
So, do you want MORE info on me? Too bad, you're gonna get it anyways. Sometime soon I'll post the listing for my entire DVD/CD collections. I think what a person listens too and watches gives a good glimpse into their personality. The CD part is a huge undertaking, since most of it is custom made cds, so I'll have to list the songs individually and probably add comments so I don't look like a dumbass in some of my song choices.
Later,
Rob AKA Extreme

The SWF will continue
Yes, I know last time I said that I wouldn't be working on the SWF, but as a man who makes instant decisions, I just took up writing it again. I finished the primer that will introduce the characters, and the debut show is being worked on. I'm discovering that with multiple projects on my plate, I pick up on one when I feel inspired, then may not work on another for a long time. At least know that they are all started, so maybe one night where I can't sleep, I'll just get into doing one of them.

Look Who's Back...
Hello all! I have finally found some time to write up another entry in the ol' blog. On the writing front, I have devoted more efforts to a story I am writing, which will be used as the template to make a screenplay. Sadly, my writing on the SWF has suffered, and I really seem to have lost interest. I don't feel confident enough in the work to contunue with it, so all further plans to do so have been scrapped. Starface however, while still in it's early stages, will be done, eventually. If I am in my senior year of college, or even married by then remains to be seen. This story though, is really shaping up. I'm learning more of my talents as a writer, and having fun. At first I felt it was better served as a screenplay, but opted to make a story first, then do the screenplay, hopefully giving more to work with. While it seems on the surface that my story has been done many times before, I think I add a little more depth to it. Without giving it away, the ending is what I am most satisfied with, but am unsure how it will come across in the story form. From what I came up with, a screenplay better explains it, but hey I'm up to the challenge. I just hope there's a way to have it come across the way I envision it. I sure as heck don't want to change the end for the story version, as the idea of the outcome is what actually inspired me to go through with the story, and is the only way I ever wanted to end it with. Enough of my ramblings, thanks for reading.
Rob AKA Extreme